So you’re planning a family friendly wedding and want to include the kiddos! That’s really great because children love to feel included in what might normally be seen as an event for adults. In this article, we’ll talk about different roles and tasks that children can fulfill at the wedding ceremony.
Age Appropriate Activities
Let’s start with talking about age appropriate roles. A task that is easily manageable for a nine-year-old might be a completely different story for a four-year-old. For children that are old enough to walk on their own, leading the wedding procession as the flower boy or girl, is a classic assignment. A toddler could also serve as the ring bearer, carrying the ring securely fastened to a pillow. If you like this idea, but don’t want to entrust the real wedding ring into the hands of a young child, consider using a dummy ring and having the officiant perform a smooth transition to the real thing.
Children a little older (ages 6-10) might be old enough to perform a short song or read a poem at some point during the ceremony. Most kids love blowing bubbles or throwing confetti, or even ringing bells to brighten the atmosphere. Older kids might also really enjoy taking part in unity rituals like candle lighting or sand mixing ceremonies. Something as simple as holding the unity candle while the couple lights it together, or holding the glass for the couple to pour sand into can be a highlight for children. Just make sure to be extra cautious, especially when allowing children access to fire.
Older children such as young teenagers might really enjoy showing off their artistic talents at the ceremony. Maybe someone is a poet and would like to write something specifically for the wedding. Or perhaps one or two children are musicians and can perform a duet together. If nothing else, they can serve as ushers and help guests find their seats, or even share a small toast or wish for the couple.
Have Reasonable Expectations
With children it’s important to give them clear instructions for what’s expected of them. Rehearsing their role can be a huge help in ensuring things run smoothly. Practicing at home is definitely an option, but it might also be a help to familiarize them with the ceremony space and have them practice with the couple’s direct involvement.
Keep children’s brief attention spans in mind and assign them tasks that are engaging and not too long-winded. For example standing still for twenty minutes in front of a crowd is quite challenging for most young children. Plan for quick and easy exits, once they have fulfilled their role. Because children can be quite unpredictable, have a backup plan in case they are too shy, get overwhelmed or throw a temper tantrum and can’t be a part of the ceremony.
Create a Fun and Relaxed Atmosphere
The most important thing is that any involvement from the children is with the purpose of keeping the ceremony fun and lighthearted. Make sure to remind them that it’s okay if they’re not perfect. Remember that the whole point is to bring smiles, laughter and joy into the ceremony.
Include Children in Other Parts of the Wedding
Perhaps the kids can help create decorations for the ceremony space. Otherwise, simple things like allowing them to draw something in the guest book, or create a separate drawing as a wedding present, is an activity that many children would be delighted to partake in. Another great way to include children in your wedding ceremony is to capture some wedding photos with them. A picture of just the kids and the couple, could be the cutest one in the entire wedding album!
Fun Activities for the Kids
Since they won’t be able to participate in the drinking and partying aspect of the ceremony, consider how you can still provide entertainment for after the ceremony. Having special kiddie snacks is one great way to keep kids happy. Consider handing out some pre-ceremony snacks to parents.
Perhaps you arrange a space such as an indoor gym, or outdoor play area where the children can engage with each other in creative play. It might be smart to designate one or two adults with the task of childcare during the reception. Plan this far enough in advance so you can hire someone if necessary.
Finally, if you take the extra time to include children in your wedding ceremony you can create lasting and heartwarming memories. Remember to be patient, flexible, and focus on creating a joyful and inclusive celebration for everyone.
– Bernard Paul