Sawateekap! Are you planning a traditional Thai wedding? Maybe you just want to include some Thai elements. Perhaps you’re planning a destination wedding in Thailand and just want to find out a bit more about the culture. In this article we’ll talk about ten popular Thai wedding traditions.
1. Choosing an Auspicious Wedding Date
Strongly influenced by the Chinese wedding traditions, the Thai custom is to pick a date for the wedding date based on ancient astrology. Families will consult a monk, an astrologer and their families before they decide on the final wedding date.
2. Making Merit
The tradition of making merit is one of the most important pre-wedding steps in Thai culture. On the morning of the wedding the couple invites an odd number of Buddhist monks to their home and serve them food. It must be an odd number of monks. Moreover, the more that are invited the more fruitful the blessing will be. Nine is seen as a lucky number in Thai culture, so it’s best if the couple invites nine monks to perform the blessings and wish the couple a happy, healthy life. After the monks have blessed the union the couple can continue to the temple for the rest of the wedding.
3. The Wedding Procession
After the blessing, the groom and his family lead a parade known as Khan Maak to the brides house. This is the official beginning of the engagement ceremony. Accompanied by traditional long drums, lively dancing, and dressed in bright colors of the rainbow, troop makes it’s way to the brides house.
4. Door Games
Once the entourage makes it to the brides home, the entrance may be blocked by symbolic doors and gates, creating a challenge for the groom. Funny games ensue to gain the respect of the bride and win her hand in marriage.
5. Engagement Ceremony
In addition to the wedding ceremony there’s also an engagement ceremony. Right after the doorgames the groom will make the marriage proposal and thus begins the official engagement ceremony. The ceremony is mostly just for the close family members of the bride and groom and involves the exchange of engagement rings. Although historically these pre-wedding events might have taken place across the span of a few days, these days they mostly happen in one day.
6. White Thread Ceremony
This is where an elderly monk ties white strings soaked in holy water around the couples wrists, connecting their hands together. There is then a sort of tug-o-war match between the couple and when the thread breaks the one with the longest thread has a deeper love.
White string, or sai sin, are tied around the couple’s wrists by wedding guest as wishes for good luck. In order for their charm to work, the bracelets must be worn for at least three days after the wedding.
7. Holy Water Ceremony
In the ceremony known in Thai as Rod Nam Sang, the couple kneels in front of the elder with garlands around their necks and receive a special blessing. A conch shell, or sang is filled with holy water (rod nam) and poured over their heads. Afterwards the wedding guests will put gifts (usually money) into a basket for the couple. In return they will receive a small memento of gratefulness from the couple.
8. Wedding Reception
Unlike many western wedding traditions where wedding reception parties involve a lof of food and dancing, Thai wedding receptions are a little more relaxed. A few family members give speeches and toasts congratulating the couple.
Later, the couple cuts the wedding cake, serving first their parents and the elderly. More toasts will ensue, followed by plenty of dancing. Then wedding party may already be over by 11 p.m. with those who still want to go strong, finding their way to the nearest karaoke bar for more drinks and celebration.
9. Preparing the Bridal Bed
When the couple finally makes it to the honeymoon suite, it’s not uncommon for an elderly couple to be found sitting on the newly made wedding bed. In Thai culture, an elderly couple symbolizes a long and happy marriage. They may comment on how good the bed feels, an indication to the couple receiving children. Finally, bags of rice or coins may also be laid out on the bed as further symbols of good luck and fertility.
10. Do’s and Dont’s at a Thai Wedding
It’s customary for the groom’s family to pay a dowry, or sinsod to the bride. This is something you should be prepared for if you are not Thai and your fiancee is Thai.
Also, as far as wedding attire is concerned, do not wear all white or all black. These colors are generally worn at funerals.
Lastly if you are not a practicing Buddhist, if possible avoid the religeous aspects of the ceremony, unless you have familiarized yourself thoroughly with the customs and practices involved. This will show your respect for the monks and elders who practice religiously.
Officiate a Thai-American Wedding Ceremony
Don’t miss the opportunity to officiate an Thai-American wedding ceremony for one of your friends or family. You can get ordained online for free with a number of online organizations by just filling out a simple form that only takes a couple minutes to complete. We highly suggest getting ordained with American Marriage Ministries. Once ordained, you’ll have access to a library of information to help you learn all the aspects of wedding from writing your speech to filling out the marriage license.
By now you should have a good idea of some Thai wedding traditions you can include in your ceremony.
-Bernard Paul